Musings

On the Sometimes Horrible, Mostly Hilarious Forms of Hate

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Here is an unwavering fact of life: at some point in your life, no matter what, someone (or maybe lots of someones) is going to severely dislike you. They may even dislike you so much to the extent that they will use the word ‘hate’ when describing how they feel about you. Now, before your minds trail off to far-flung pastures, let me just briefly clarify the kind of hate I’m talking about. This is the lowercase kind of hate.

Not violent. Mostly vibe-y. It really just kind of annoyingly hangs around like that errant fly that you just can’t get rid of for several days. I’m talking about super-intense, off the charts dislike. The severe aversion some people may have to all (or most! or some!) of the things that make you you. Either way, it’s pretty much an unavoidable rite of passage in life and growing up, especially if you’ve got any kind of existence online at all. So we’ve gotta learn to deal.

It will probably surprise about 1.5 percent of you that I have some experience being hated. Something about me, especially when expressed in verbal form, just tends to rub some people in all the wrong ways. I have way too many close friends who have told me this. I have a somewhat strong personality and occasionally strong opinions which are, unsurprisingly, a lot easier to hate than your average mild-mannered, get-alongness kind of attitude. Shocker.

But here’s a special caveat that’s important to note if you happen to be one of those people who has been ‘hated on’ one time too many: Not being hated does not necessarily mean that you are a super awesome person. It just means that you are not controversial. ACTUALLY, LET ME CLARIFY: Not being hated ever can SOMETIMES mean that you really are a super awesome person who is consistently wonderful and genuine and just a bucketful of sunshine AND HOW IN THE WORLD COULD ANYONE EVER POSSIBLY HATE YOU, BAMBI’S SECOND COUSIN? But, other times, if you’ve never even been mildly hated then it means that you’re basically human oatmeal. It means that no one has ever even noticed you enough to realize how mind-numbingly blah you actually can be. But, hey, it also means you’re lucky!

And, just because I don’t want to come off as an actual hate-mongerer (i.e. someone who condescendingly thrives on people hating me, i.e. Kanye West), let me just very briefly debunk some common ‘hate-talk’ that I don’t ever actually subscribe to.

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7 thoughts on “On the Sometimes Horrible, Mostly Hilarious Forms of Hate

  1. Hilarious, sharp, and witty! I can see why you could be hated so easily… you’re a writing goldmine.

    I hope you don’t think this is forward, but I just have to ask. What in God’s name are you doing with Kuwaiti magazines? You should be writing for The New Yorker or Vanity Fair.

    1. Simon! Those are all huge compliments coming from you–thank you for that much-needed dose of flattery!

      And Kuwaiti magazines can actually surprise you, as I’m sure you already know. There’s a lot of untapped potential and stories worth being told in the industry. I love that fresh energy that Kuwaiti magazines provide. Plus, I think it’s safe to say that The New Yorker might scoff at this humble piece.

  2. loved your post , sharp and to the point , I know I am not perfect , I know that i am annoying sometimes , but a i faced a hate war from a group of people that in a point they made me feel that I wanna leave the country and hide away

    there is no specific thing that made them mad or hate me , they just got irritated of whatever I say , do , wear and even if I am happy

    at the beginning I used to stay away from them , do u remember when I meet you at the NY event by bassuma ?? they were there and I decided to leave because I don`t want to hear anything

    Now I am stronger , I decided that those people will never ever control my life they are going to hate no matter what and this is their problem

    Love you beautiful

    1. Oh, I’m so sorry you’re having to go through that kind of negativity, m’dear. I remember you being a little shifty that night and wanting to leave pretty early.

      It really is one of the worst feelings knowing that someone seems to hate you for no reason other than the fact that you are just being yourself. I know exactly what that feels like and I’ve been put in similarly awkward situations during social events over this last year.

      I also used to be really bothered and get visibly upset when some people would go out of their way to show me how much they hated me or hated the things I said. But now I just shrug and laugh it off. Not everyone is meant to like us and we aren’t meant to like everyone. Life goes on.

      I’m so happy to hear that you’re not letting those Negative Nanncies get to you anymore and that you’re embracing your wonderful self openly and happily!

      Lots of love, m’dear!

  3. I once witnessed someone being super rude to you the First time I met you. The first thought that came to my head was ” She is soooo jealous cuz she can never have the same literal creativity you do”. The first feeling was pity.. that some humans would rather put all their energy into bringing a great person down rather than moving their behind and trying to get to their level. It still shocks me everytime I see this, but I am also thankful that I am always shocked cuz that just means I could never ever be that person. Love and Sunshine , W

  4. Well said cousin 😀 (y) although i think it should be hard for a normal human being to hate! Another thing , when u hate someone it means that u gave him a large space in ur head , so basically hating u someone equals finding him/her interesting! For me if i dont love someone it doesnt mean that i hate him/her it means that i really dont care and indifferent to their existance.

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