Musings

The Complete Guide to Getting Zero Closure (And Being Ok With It)

  • What was the story again?

Look, the only takeaway you can be sure to find at the end of this whole deep-sea metaphorical plunge is this: the story may stop, but it never really ends. The emotions you carry around with you now will not be the same ones you carry around later. They will morph endlessly and ceaselessly and when you least expect it. That’s because no emotion is final. How you feel today will not be how you feel tomorrow. Or the day after that. Or the day after that, or after that, or after that. Odds are you’ll eventually get back into your psychological submarine pod and start poking around the same lost emotional wreckage once again (YES I AM FULLY COMMITTING TO THIS METAPHOR). And you know what? The more times you truly look at something, the more perspectives and interpretations you’ll probably get out of it too.

You may end up realizing that what you initially thought was the whole story was actually just the Cliff Notes version. You may find solace in finally being able to piece together the puzzle once and for all, at least in your own head and for your own peace of mind.

Or you may just realize that despite all the digging and prodding and excavating that you can do, when it comes down to it, nothing ever really wraps together at all. That you just have to go on with your life like so many other people do with this minor, persistent affliction clinging to you, slightly irritating you every once in a while, and knowing that it will never really die down.

And, somehow, that’s okay too.

All my love!

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2 thoughts on “The Complete Guide to Getting Zero Closure (And Being Ok With It)

  1. A very touchy topic that has personally been looming around my subconscious for the past 5 odd years. I’m in a similar situation with a high school friend and till this day try to analyse on how and why the relationship faded. Although, we hardly bump into each other like in your situation……ouch! Akward! Despite some attempts every once in a while, it seems returning to the same level of friendship has now become futile.

    Thanks for the lovely tips and great post.

    1. Ok, first of all, I really have to apologize for this monstrously late reply! I actually thought I replied much sooner but it turns out that WordPress (or maybe my internet connection?) went wonky and didn’t post my original earlier reply many weeks ago. Totally my bad.

      And, yes, that can be a very sticky situation to be in and the potential for awkwardness is unparalleled. The closer you used to be with that person the more you’re going to realize that getting closure with them once you are no longer a part of each other’s lives is, really, almost impossible. You just have to make peace with it and trudge along with this minor annoyance that will fade over time.

      Thank you for your consistently strong comments, man! Truly appreciated.

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